Domestic violence is pattern of behaviour through which a person seeks to dominate and control another person. Domestic and family violence usually occurs when someone in an intimate or familial relationship tries to assert control or power over another. It can be psychological, social, physical, sexual, verbal, technology and financial abuse, stalking, property damage and reproductive control. It is usually women who are the victims of domestic violence although some men can also be victims. Domestic violence is often not recognised by others and it occurs across in communities and across all cultures.
Being abused is NOT normal.
Psychological: Put downs, name calling and intimidation, undermining self-esteem, sulking and threats to commit suicide.
Verbal: Saying things to scare a person/s, name calling, threats and intimidation.
Sexual: Forcing sexual activity. Unwanted sexual activity, forcing a partner to do things they don’t want to do sexually, rape, humiliation of a sexual nature.
Social: Controlling friends and people you meet/see, what you wear and what you do. Preventing the person from leaving the house or going to their place of worship. Preventing them contacting family of friends, monitoring you mobile phone. Refusing to do any housework or child care. Making the person feel guilty about work relationships or friends or going to work. Checking up on whereabouts of person. Making all the decisions.
Physical: Threats and actual harm causing injuries including bruising, punching, hitting, breaking bones, pushing, choking, threaten with a weapon. Threaten or actual physical abuse to children as above or pregnant woman, denying sleep or warmth or food. Denying medical care. Driving in a dangerous or threatening manner with other family in the car.
Financial: Withholding and controlling the finances, denies access to money or makes the person ask for money for basic items such as food. Not allowing the person to apply for a job or making it difficult. Controlling credit cards or access to bank accounts.
Technology: using technology to abuse, threaten or humiliate, controlling access to technology and monitoring things like mobile phones. Denying access to mobile phone.
Reproductive Control: not allowing use of a contraceptive or controlling type of contraceptive. Controlling timing and number of children, forcing decisions about termination of pregnancy.
Property Damage: Punching holes in the wall, damaging the car, abusing the family pet, taking away things that are important.
Stalking: following the family member, spying on them, repeated phone calls and texts, harming pets, loitering around the workplace or where the person is going, sending unwanted deliveries, sending chocolates or flowers, damaging property or moving belonging around, changing details on personal information.
1800 737 732
24 hour national sexual assault, family and domestic violence counselling line for any Australian who has experienced, or is at risk of, family and domestic violence and/or sexual assault.
No to Violence offers assistance, information and counselling to help men who use family violence.
Call 1300 766 491 if you would like help with male behavioural and relationship concerns.